“I knew about cancer, but I didn’t know about bladder cancer – I was completely blindsided by this diagnosis.”
Tim was diagnosed at 49 years old – just a couple months shy of his 50th birthday, a time people would normally be spending planning a big milestone birthday celebration.
“I was in great shape, no major health scares at this point in my life. I was playing hockey, eating right and being active. One day while I was playing hockey, I was cross-checked in the ribs and kidney area. It was painful, but I finished the game. In the morning, however, when I woke up, I found blood in my urine.”
He thought perhaps this could be attributed to his recent blow to the kidney area during his last hockey game and was not initially concerned. His wife, however, encouraged him to see his doctor. Tim’s doctor was concerned with the blood in his urine, so he ordered some tests and referred him to a urologist just to be sure.
His doctors noticed elevated white blood cells in his blood work and he proceeded to undergo a cystoscopy. “Watching it on screen, I felt like I was watching a National Geographic documentary, but then I realized it was me on the screen, it was very surreal.” recalls Tim.
During the cystoscopy, doctors discovered a polyp, so they took a biopsy. “I didn’t think much of it at the time”, said Tim. A short time later, he was asked to come in to see his doctor. They had received his results and told him it was cancer.
His initial thoughts were “Am I going to be able to live my life? What about my family?”, but the very first words that came out of his mouth were “will I still be able to play hockey? I was in shock and my life passed in front of my eyes”. As an active hockey player, Tim was concerned about what his future might be like.
“I never thought I would get cancer.” At this point, Tim and his wife were quite familiar with cancer and the experience of dealing with cancer treatments. His daughter was diagnosed with mid brain techglio tumor at only 9 years old. She underwent over 12 brain surgeries, and was given only a few years to live. Today, she is 33 years old and still living with the complications of the tumour.
He recounts the affect that cancer can have on a family and seeing how it affected others; stresses of money, mortality, intimacy, work, and general life has an effect. “It brings your family closer together, or it can tear your family apart.” Tim was fortunate to be supported by his loving wife of 33 years and family and friends, who supported him throughout his cancer journey.
Before his surgery, his doctors suggested getting a neo bladder, since he was still quite young in age. In terms of treatment, doctors gave him a few options to consider, but ultimately, Tim decided to proceed with bladder removal.
“I recall being in the clinic waiting room, looking around the room and I was significantly younger than many of the patients that were in there.”
His doctor handed him a pamphlet about Bladder Cancer Canada, “I didn’t know anything at that point. My doctors told me to reach out to BCC, and that’s where I did all of my research and read all of the resources – the organization really helped me understand my diagnosis”.
Tim recalls preparing for surgery, and not really thinking much of it. “I thought bladder removal would be like removing an appendix – it was not”. During his surgery, the doctors discovered that his cancer had spread to 70% of his bladder in just 4 months. He had high-grade urothelial carcinoma and it had spread outside of his bladder to his stomach lining. They proceeded to take out his appendix, prostate, part of his colon, and lymph nodes to be sure.
Unfortunately, due to his recent surgeries, Tim experienced some complications and challenges, including Shortened Bowel Syndrome. He also had to teach himself how to properly catheterize himself, which wasn’t discussed prior to surgery.
At one point, Tim had dropped down to 100 lbs. He had lost 80lbs and was experiencing difficulties and had to undergo 6 additional surgeries to treat some intestinal blockages that had formed. He was in and out of the hospital undergoing treatments to clear out some remaining scar tissue, and the final surgery was a success. It took nearly a year for Tim to gain all his weight back. He was experiencing incredible pain and was taking medication to provide support.
“While I was in the hospital, I was sure I was going to die” says Tim, “You do a lot of self realizations such as you can’t take money with you, in the end, all you have is family”. During his time of treatments and surgeries, Tim and his wife were still taking care of their daughter. He didn’t quite know what life was going to be like post-surgery for the entire family.
As part of his treatments, Tim completed 12 rounds of chemo. He felt terrible the whole time, “I was so tired and nauseous, I didn’t even get to ring the bell when I completed the final round, I was just so tired”. However, once Tim was feeling a little more like himself, he drove himself back to the clinic just that he could ring that bell – he had earned it!
Today, Tim says that “life’s good, post-care was amazing. I never had to wait too long or worry that I wasn’t being taken care of.” He is still dealing with some of the effects of chemo, including experiencing 50% hearing loss attributed to his chemo treatments, as well as dealing with Stage 4 kidney disease, but that hasn’t left Tim feeling discouraged, “After everything I’ve gone through, I’m happy to be alive.”
As part of his post-care, Tim sought out the help of a sexual wellness therapist, who suggested that he speak to someone about his experience. He saw a therapist who, after speaking with Tim further, helped determine that he had experienced some level of PTSD after his journey. Tim says he found it incredible valuable speaking to someone and taking therapy sessions to further discuss his experience with chemo, his sexual wellbeing, and general wellbeing, “they did wonders on my mental state.”
Today, Tim is in remission and is back at work at Air Canada where Tim has worked for nearly 25 years.
“My life was on hold for 4 years, 1 more year to be diagnosed Cancer free, but things are good now and I have adapted my lifestyle to my condition and we’re going to Hawaii this spring!”
Recently, Tim was also able to provide some one on one support with a patient facing a similar diagnosis, acting as a peer support volunteer and answer questions as somewhere who’s “been there”. “I’m happy to lend a listening ear and help however I can to someone in need.”
